10 – Lifting (or pretending to lift) weights that you can’t handle. While squatting, moving the weight 1 inch is not a rep. Get something out of your workout. Do less weight and do a full rep.
9 – Don’t be the naked guy who stands in the locker room with his leg on the bench talking to everyone who will listen. It’s creepy. (Does this happen in the ladies locker room also? Just wondering.)
8 – Don’t make fun of someone who is out of shape. They are there for the same reason that most people are in there. To get into better shape. You’re probably the same dick that #1 will apply too.
7 – Don’t make fun of how much someone lifts. If you are doing it with your friends and it’s motivating and competitive that’s different.
6 – Don’t play your music so loud that I can hear it while you have headphones on. I like loud music when I lift but I doubt I want to hear the crap you are playing.
5 – Don’t ask me if I am using something that is 10 feet away from me, while I’m in the middle of a set. I’m not going to answer you.
4 – Putting cologne on before going into the gym. It’s not a night club. If you are doing it to cover up B.O. Take a shower and use some deodorant.
3– People talking on their phone while working out. If you need your phone in there, walk somewhere where no one can over hear you. You look like an idiot when you do curls while talking into the phone. And a total moron if you do it while doing squats.
2 – Free Pizza and Donuts as incentives for people to workout at Planet Fitness. I had to put something in here about PF. For some reason they just annoy me.
1 – People who don’t put their weights away. If you were strong enough to put plates on the bar and do your sets, then your lazy ass should be strong enough to take them off and put them back. I’m not that impressed with what you left on the bar.
10. Don’t worry, they won’t be there for long. Tendonitis/bursitis/natural predators will take them out soon. Plus: Darwin Awards.
9. No, we don’t do this in the ladies locker room. If anything, it’s a race to see who can be naked the fewest seconds between work out gear and street clothes. FYI: If a dude airs his junk too long, just say very loudly across the locker room, “That’s smart, dude. You definitely want to let that herpes cream dry before you put the rubber thong back on.”
8. Fun fact: someone out of shape who’s working out is making waaaay better headway than an athlete working out. It’s proven science. The newbie is changing their body drastically, the muscle man is merely doing maintenance. It applies to even the slowest walk around the block if the person hasn’t walked in a while. So, if we’re all doing this for points….
7. Unless they are a total dick. One guy would howl like a wolf on every max day, annoying the crap out of us. I spread an idea around that maybe men make the same sound climaxing in bed that they do on the bench. Wolfman immediately stopped showing up and you never heard the weight room so quiet.
6. Fun game: stand right in front of Mr. Headphones and mouth a question to him without making any sound. Get him to keep turning the sound down until it’s completely off and keep mouthing silent words. He’ll either get the joke or go deaf eventually. Win, win.
5. Anyone who talks to you in the middle of a set is A. new to the sport, B. suffers narcissistic personality disorder, C. a tool, D. all of the above. If you explain it to them and they get huffy, ask them if they also enjoy starting up conversations with strangers at urinals.
4. I’m not sure what’s worse, the added scents or the natural ones. There are certain cultures that do not use deodorant and they all seem to congregate at the fly machine for some reason, perhaps to fan their toxins out into the crowd for maximum damage. That being said, I believe Axe body spray is scientific proof of Satan.
3. Sidle up to them and pretend you are the person on the other end of the phone, replying very loudly to everything they say. When they get angry, exclaim, “Eight hundred dollars for an eightball/lap dance/blowjob? That’s outrageous!” and storm away.
2. Planet Fitness is the Jack in the Box of fitness centers. 24 Hour is the McDonalds, LA Fitness is the Burger King, YMCA is the Wendy’s, Bally just sucks, Gold’s is the Chipotle. Frankly, anyone dumb enough to pay all that money on a workout they can easily crank out at their local city rec center is doing nothing to dispel the old “dumbbell” jokes. Remember, Arnold and Ferrigno rocked it old school and they did just fine.
1. I used to get pissed at the lazy weight-leavers. Then, I had a brilliant idea: I’d put all the weights away, myself, as my grip exercises and clean up the entire weight room between sets. I got a spectacular workout, my weight room looked great, and other people started copying me. Neener, neener, lazies.
You got some good ideas. I’ve used a few that are similar.
great top 10. all very true.
BTW- that doesn’t happen in the ladies locker room
I love planet fitness. My work schedule is 3pm to 3 am, 3 days/week. I like the fact they are open all night long because it accommodates my schedule. I can go there at 2 am and get a good workout. . There is no need to post your list of things that annoy you there because the members are respectful of each other. That’s the reason I like it there so much.
A big part of training and results has to do with atmosphere. So if it provides that for you than that’s great. I’m not bashing the members at all. But I do have my opinion of Planet Fitness and it’s not a gym where I would train. They talk about being a judgment free gym but them seem to judge everyone else. At my gym there are people from every level of fitness and they are all respectful. Other than that the list is suppose to be funny, even if those are things that are annoying at the gym.
I don’t go the gym, I usually prefer to work out at home. This post was really funny,
Thanks. Nothing wrong with that. For me the gym adds the atmosphere that helps motivate me. On top of that they have a lot more equipment then I have. It’s all about you anyway. Just get it done and reach your goals.
You make some very good points. The one about a guy being naked and parading his junk is ridiculous, no one likes an attention seeker.